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How to be a Good Dominant?

For the longest time, dominance in relationships has been getting a bad rap and is often considered as either BDSM or downright abuse. However, there is more to dominance than what meets the eyes.

how to be a good dominant

The truth is that once used in the right form and context, a dominant personality and dominance in a relationship can actually be something positive. Being a good dominant can be a great way to make relationships better and ensure that the parties involved will get as much as what they need and want as possible.

Being a Dominant the Healthy Way

To be a good dominant, the very first thing that should be addressed to ensure healthy dominance is for both parties to have the ability to exert dominance. If just one partner exerts dominance while the other is submissive, it goes to say that only one partner will get their wants all the time with the other partner constantly submitting to these wants. It can result to an unhealthy relationship in which one partner always loses out on things important for them or they will always need to feel cared for and loved.

Healthy and good dominance requires both parties to have the chance to stand up for themselves and express their needs and wants in an effective way. If one partner is having a hard time with this, it is a must for them to get additional support and help to offer them their much needed encouragement. In any case, if one partner cannot comfortably shift towards a dominant lifestyle, they won’t be able to get the things they need from their partner. It might cause issues in the relationship and make it hard to continue the relationship.

Good Dominance is Where Everyone’s Needs are Met

One secret on how to become a good dominant is to ensure that both partners find it comfortable enough to voice their needs. These things can be minor things such as the need for shelter or food. These can also be more extensive like the need for companionship at specific times. What is important here is not the type of needs that each partner has but the fact that they should feel comfortable to tell the other person regarding these needs at the certain times they need them the most. It allows the other partner to do the things they can to support and help the relationship in the healthiest way possible.

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Another thing is that both partners must also be comfortable as they express their wants to each other. This is where needs become easier as they focus on the human condition’s basic aspects and wants seem a bit perkier. Partners who have difficulties expressing themselves usually struggle with this since they feel like these things are not important or that it is hard to explain their wants to their partner. A want can be anything at all and this is why there are partners who struggle since they feel as if they just have silly wants or that they won’t be understood by their partner.

If both parties are uncomfortable with expressing their wants even if they might be a bit silly, it can become a negative thing for the relationship. Aside from that, it also means that either or both partners are having difficulties with the exhibited dominance.

It could lead to one partner being more dominant than the other and it can also mean that the two partners will need some help to offer the right level of encouragement and support to each other. The point here is to recognize issues as soon as possible and search for ways for both partners to make the necessary changes and improvements in the relationship.

Learn to be Dominant the Good Way

You can always start small if you are having a hard time with the process. Expressing your basic needs can be as something simple like dinner. This is an expression of basic need and this is something that must be easy to express since the individual knows that it is a need that all people around them have. The need to eat is understandable, common and easy and simple to express. However, this should be constantly done for the person to be more comfortable with it and feel like their partner has taken interest to help them.

From there, it is a must for both partners to start becoming comfortable with the expression of their wants. With this practice, it might be possible for both partners to make a pledge of expressing at least one want daily for something that isn’t a basic necessity. It can be a want for a particular item or for the partner to respond to them or for pretty much anything at all. A key requirement here is that both partners are required to make a request and both should also be required to listen then follow through with that request.

Once the two partners become more comfortable things, it will soon become second nature for them to fully express themselves and with the other partner likewise giving the appropriate response to their wants or needs. The best way of doing this is to get to know more about the personality’s opposite side. It is not only about understanding how to be a good dominant and be in control all the time. It is also about learning to allow the partner to have their needs and wants and this also needs some level of submission.

Dominance Defined

Dominance refers to being in control of something. For people in a relationship, it has long been characterized as being completely in control of their partner. Dominance, however, can also be used in a good and healthy way and is also applicable to both partners equally. It allows both partners to feel that they got some amount of control and it also ensures that the partners can both get their needs and wants in the relationship. The result is that when the two partners show dominance, they can be in control of every situation together with no need to sacrifice their individual needs.