Enrich Love

How to Figure Out Your Partner’s Love Language

Love language goes beyond the mere use of words to express your love for another person. It is also about how you receive love in return. When it comes to love language, your way of expressing is probably different from how you receive it.

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There are actually five different love languages and these are physical touch, words of affirmation, gifts, quality time, and acts of service. You likely receive and give a combination of these love languages. There is also a chance that your own love language changes after some time or it might even change on a daily basis.

But, no matter what your love language might be, one thing is for sure – it plays an important role in your relationships. Learning how to figure out your partner’s love language is often the key to a successful relationship and a stronger bond with one another.

Physical Touch

One of the primary means to communicate emotional intimacy is through physical touch. This is why it is not a big surprise that it is considered as a very powerful way to communicate love in any form of relationship.

couple sitting on wooden bench

Embracing, kissing, holding hands, and engaging in sexual intercourse are the perfect examples of physical touches that your partner can use to communicate his or her love.

If physical touch is the primary love language of a person, they might feel unloved in the absence of it. They might feel more secure if there is a physical touch.

What should you do if the love language of your partner is physical touch yet you grew up unused to it? One simple thing you can do is to touch your partner when you walk into the room. Sit closer to your partner while watching TV. Kiss and hug before leaving the house and upon coming back.

Words of Affirmation

Many people feel more loved if they hear words of affirmation from their partner. These affirmations are like a reminder that everything in the relationship is good and going well.

People who have this love language feel the support every time their partner tells them that they are gorgeous or appreciated. It is often expressed in various ways such as in the form of spoken word, text, card, or letter.

Words speak much louder than actions with this particular love language. It focuses on the use of language that lets your partner feel that you cherish, appreciate, and desire them.

Gifts

Giving gifts is a natural part of life, particularly during special occasions such as Christmas and birthdays. If the love language of your partner is receiving gifts, they would like it they receive physical things from you even if there is no occasion.

They consider gifts as the physical token of how you appreciate and think of them. For your partner, it shows your understanding of them even if it is just a bunch of flowers or homemade gift. Receiving gifts from you improves their mood in a snap of a finger.

person holding present box

Gift giving is a good way to show your partner that you think of them affectionately. If the preferred love language of your partner is receiving gifts, they will feel more appreciated if they get thoughtful and meaningful presents from you. Price is not an issue here. Instead, what matters the most is that your gifts show that you think of them.

What should you do if you don’t like giving gifts but receiving them is the preferred love language of your partner? If you never received gifts when you were young or you have no idea how to choose one, now is the best time for you to learn a new love language. Practice it as often as you can because gift giving is one of the easiest to learn out of all the five love languages.

Quality Time

People whose love language is quality time usually seek their partner’s attention without being too needy. Instead, they want to spend some quality time together as consider it is as a way to enhance the sense of connection with their loved one. It is not only about going to the movies together or going on dinner dates. Rather, it is all about genuine attention with your energy focused on being there with and for your partner.

Maybe you find it a bit difficult, especially if you have busy schedules that finding time to connect is just impossible. One way to solve this dilemma is to take part in shared activities that the two of you love. Exercise together, read books, or enjoy a cup of coffee during the weekends. With these simple acts, you don’t only do something good for yourself but you also get to share that passion with the person you love.

Acts of Service

When you speak of acts of service, this refers to doing things that your partner likes. Good examples of these include preparing a meal, cleaning, making the bed, buying groceries, clearing or setting the table, or taking the kids to school.

couple drinking coffee inside coffee shop

Acts of service require energy, time, planning, and thought and when done with positive spirit, these are wonderful expressions of love. If acts of service are the love language of your partner, actions speak louder than words. If your husband loves to maintain his car, he will definitely feel your love if you lend him a helping hand every now and then.

A simple help from you is enough to show your partner that you truly care. Laziness and broken promises are a big no-no for people whose love language is acts of service. They don’t tolerate people who give them extra work. So if you don’t do them a favor as a way to show how you love them, they will consider it as your way of saying that you don’t really value them.

The Bottom Line

For any relationship to be truly successful, it is ideal to have all of these five love languages. Learning how to figure out your partner’s love language and your own will have a positive impact on your relationship as a whole.