When it comes to love, timing is everything. Saying “I love you” for the first time can be nerve-wracking, but there are a few things you should know beforehand. So, there are a few things you should know on when to say “I love you” for the first time:
Say It When You’re Ready
If you do a quick online search, you will find various rules when it comes to saying these three words. There are people who say that you might turn someone off if you say it right away. Others will also tell you that you have to wait for a specific number of months before saying it.
In reality, it could take several months of exclusively seeing each other or weeks of dating. However, it is best that you only say it when you are 100% ready and sure that you really love the person and you are fully prepared to let them know how you feel. The important thing here is to be in tune with your own feelings and emotions. Once you are ready to say “I love you” to someone, that is when you should say it for the very first time.
Say It When You Want to Free Your Feelings
Experts believe that saying “I love you” should always depend on your personal preferences. In times like today when people play games, they will respect you even more if you say it authentically on the right moment that you feel that it is real and true for you.
If you start contemplating if it is too late or too soon to say it, it could come off as being unauthentic. Even if your date isn’t prepared it to confess their love for you, sharing your own emotions will give you the sense of being free. It lets your date know where you really stand and it could even cheer them on to open up their own feelings even more. Authenticity can go a long way and sometimes, the present is the best time to say it.
Say It When You Mean It
This is probably one of the most important rules for saying “I love you.” Never say these words if you don’t mean it.
You need to check your real motives before confessing your love. You shouldn’t say it for the first time if you are drunk, you feel like competing with the ex, you hope that to get more physical with the relationship, or you are afraid that you will break up soon.
Take your sweet time on reflecting on your relationship. Can you see yourself spending your future with this person? Do you feel the best when you spend time together? Are you ready to invest your whole life in the person? Love should never be confused with infatuation. See to it that you also understand and know that these words will mean putting your commitment in the relationship.
Say It When You’re Prepared to Commit
There are times when “I love you” doesn’t come with anything else. However, before telling someone that you love them, you have to be sure that you are really prepared for all the commitments that come with it. This is not just about physical commitment and it instead, it is all about emotional commitment that should be followed through on the relationship.
Say It When You Got to Know the Person Better
Different people interpret “I love you” differently. The nature of these words leaves them up to interpretation and there are others who say it randomly while some consider that these words shouldn’t be said at all.
However, it is typical that if you have only been dating for a month or less, chances are you said these words too soon. You might want to use alternative phrases for expressing your affections, especially if you are the kind of person who tends to drop this bomb too soon into the relationship. You can then use how the person responses to your phrases to determine if they feel as deep for you as you are for them.
Say It When You Believe That the Feeling is Mutual
Even though your feelings must dictate the best time to say “I love you,” saying it too soon has always been the tricky part in a new relationship. It is best that you watch for signs that your date is just putting things off to know if the feeling is mutual or not before you verbally express your love.
During the getting to know stage, you can get a good idea if the person feels the same way as you do. It would be safer to confess your love if you suspect that it come back to you as well.
If you have already fallen in love but you are unsure If this is also the same with your date, don’t say it just yet to see if there is still a chance for you to change how they feel. You can also use this chance to determine where the relationship is going.
If you don’t feel comfortable to discuss it with the other person, you might want to be sure first if what you are feeling is really love or something else. While you can always ask the feelings are mutual, doing so when there is no mutual feeling might only put a strain on the relationship.
The Bottom Line
At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter when you say it, who says it first, or who says it regularly. What matters is who says it profoundly.